Fashion Friday: Stop It, Already

I shouldn't have to write this post. It's 2012 and pretty much everyone in America has access to the internet and enough fashion parody to know when they are making a fool of themselves. And yet, for some reason, there are still otherwise well-dressed women sabotaging themselves with these mistakes.

1. STOP WEARING YOUR GYM SHOES WITH YOUR WORK CLOTHES. There is truly no excuse for this. It doesn't look good. If you're wearing properly tailored pants (and you should be), your pants are not going to be the right length for your pants. If you're wearing a skirt or dress with gym shoes ... no, I just. I can't. DO YOU LOOK IN THE MIRROR BEFORE YOU LEAVE HOME LIKE THAT? It's so unflattering. And I just cannot understand it.

Now, I'm not saying that you should be wearing your heels to commute in. This is also a bad idea, in my opinion. You're ruining your good shoes and in some cases you're putting more wear and tear on your body than you need to. You need commuting shoes, they just should not be the same shoes you wear for running or pounding the elliptical. Buy a comfortable pair of neutral flats of some sort -- metallics work great because they go with everything. I recently bought a pair of gold Sperry's to serve as my spring and summer (and probably fall!) commuter shoes.

2. GET YOUR PANTS TAILORED. It's simply unacceptable to walk around with your pants dragging on the ground. It's sloppy and you are ruining the bottom hem of your pants, which will start to show holes and fray along the fold. Take your pants to a tailor, along with your favorite pair of shoes. Put those shoes on when they measure for the hem. Hardly anyone can buy clothes straight off the rack and have them fit as they should. Find a good tailor and get used to investing a little extra to have your clothes fit.

If you're commuting in flats with pants that you will wear with heels when you are in the office, roll them up in a non-sloppy way.

3. SCRUNCHIES? SERIOUSLY? Who even still makes scrunchies? Do they? Or have these women been holding onto them since 1982 for dear life? I don't even understand. There have been countless movies, television shows and late night parodies about scrunchies. Everyone should know they aren't ok. Why do women do this to themselves? Use those Goody hair elastics or the newer, thicker elastic bands.

I know there are people out there still committing these fashion crimes. Please do your friends and co-workers a favor and just forward this along to the offenders! We can all make the world a more beautiful place.

Happy Friday!

Brussels Sprouts!

I'm fairly new to the brussels sprouts bandwagon. I never ate them growing up. Not because I didn't like them, but because my mom never made them. But I watched enough t.v. to know that I was supposed to hate them.

Back at the very beginning of January, on the eve of finding out that a guy I was starting to really like was actually married (yes, that really happened), my friend Suzie insisted we get dressed up and go out for dinner. As we tried to decide on a restaurant, I remembered that I still hadn't tried Graffiato. Suzie hadn't either, and so our decision was made. We put on dresses and heels, ordered an Uber, and walked right in to a table when we arrived on a busy Saturday night. The stars all aligned.

Despite it being my first trip to Graffiato, I had read enough tweets and reviews to know certain dishes I absolutely wanted to try, and brussels sprouts were on the list. But they surpassed every expectation I had. Insanely delicious! I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess it has a little something to do with the pancetta.

And since then, I've been a little obsessed. I've cooked them at home several times, trying them pan fried with bacon, salt and pepper ... roasted with olive oil, salt and pepper ... and another time with lemon juice, olive oil, salt and pepper. When I blogged earlier this week about FunEmployment, I mentioned that I was looking for new brussels sprouts recipes to try, and Jess left a gem in the comments. I tried it out last night and it was so amazing that I wanted to share the full thing here!


Brussels Sprouts with Balsamic and Cranberries

Ingredients*:
3 lbs brussels sprouts
1/2 cup olive oil
salt and pepper
1 cup balsamic vinegar
1/2 cup sugar
1 cup dried cranberries

* I halved this recipe for my first try, mostly because one package of brussels sprouts is enough for several nights of leftovers for just me!

The greatest thing about this recipe is that it's so simple. I always have dried cranberries and balsamic in my kitchen, but these simple ingredients still result in a fancy dish!

Directions:

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees.

To start, clean and trim your brussels sprouts. I love this part, because it reminds me that these are really just mini cabbages. I love everything mini. Anyway, I trim off the ends and pull off any loose or dead-looking outer leaves. I like to cut mine in half, because those exposed sides get so nice and crispy in the oven.

And give them another rinse for good measure.

Spread them out over a baking sheet. Drizzle with olive oil then season with salt and pepper. Toss with tongs to get them evenly coated. Pop in the oven and set the timer for 25-30 minutes.

While those are in the oven, bring balsamic vinegar and sugar to a boil in a small saucepan. Reduce heat to medium-low and cook until balsamic reduces to thick, syrupy consistency. Should take about 15-20 minutes.

I like to give the sprouts a good turn or toss on the baking sheet about halfway through. It looks like they are getting done already, but leave them in for the full 25 minutes. You want them tender inside and crispy outside.

Once you pull those out of the oven, transfer them to a serving dish and drizzle the balsamic reduction over and sprinkle with a generous amount of dried cranberries.

Toss with tongs to get everything all mixed together and coated in balsamic deliciousness and hurry up and get them in your mouth before the growling of your stomach starts to get embarrassing.

Enjoy! I certainly did.

FunEmployment Week #1

So I'm an attorney by trade. When I graduated from law school in 2006, I had an offer to join a top D.C. firm as an Associate. And that I did. Everything was all fine and dandy and I was making a shitload of money ... until the rushing rapids of litigation work slowed to a near trickle as the economy started to take a nosedive into the shitter. My firm made layoffs and I was one of the casualties.

Since then, I've worked mostly on a contract basis, meaning that I take projects with an expiration date. Truth be told, I was never happy as a big firm associate and have never tried to re-enter that market. But at the same time, I have mountains of law school loans to pay, and the salary of a government attorney is simply not enough. So I've become a slave to the great-pay-but-high-uncertainty market of contract work.

And usually, it's not that bad. I've been pretty lucky to be on mostly long-term projects. The money is good and I no longer have to check my Blackberry before going to bed at 2 a.m. on a Saturday, praying that I don't have to throw together some research and a memo after imbibing one too many margaritas.

But sometimes, the uncertainty catches up to you, and you find yourself suddenly unemployed when a project grinds to a screeching halt. Enter FunEmployment 2012.

Since I'm currently in-between projects, I have a ton of time on my hands. Since I also have no idea when I'll pick up a new project, I'm trying not to spend a crazy amount of money. So I've had to be creative with my time and energy. Here's what I can report from last week, aka FunEmployment Week #1:

1. Making a to-do list for a Monday on your couch is just as miserable as making a to-do list for a Monday at your desk. But the good news about funemployment is that it's totally acceptable to reward yourself with shots of tequila.

2. The people who go visit the cherry blossoms on a Tuesday afternoon are decidedly just as stupid as the ones who swarm down there on a Saturday with the rest of the M-F employed masses. But because there are fewer of them, you have more opportunities to tune in to the ridiculous comments they make. Next time, bring headphones.

3. You shouldn't be too eager to get through your to-do list on Monday, so that you'll "have time for fun stuff the rest of the week," because, well, there's not a whole lot of fun stuff the rest of the week. A trip to Target isn't all that fun when you have to restrain yourself from spending $187 on shit you really don't need.

4. You know all those times you wish you had a weekday to yourself, unsaddled with illness, to just sit on the couch and watch as much t.v. as you want? Be careful what you wish for; it's not all that great. I started to become one of those people wandering around the gym, looking for ways to kill another hour.

5. Renting a car and driving around with no real purpose on a sunny Friday afternoon will make the entire week of boredom seem totally worth it. Even if you're just picking up random herb plants at Home Depot and lightweight gold chain at ninety-eight cents per foot that you're determined to turn into an ah-mazing necklace. Freedom tastes so good!

After treating the weekend like it was any other weekend, aside from running up large bar tabs, I'm back on my couch today with a new to-do list. It's shorter and less exciting, my apartment is already super clean and I did a load of hardly any laundry just to feel like a housewife today. I might lose my mind if the project I'm waiting on doesn't come through soon! But in the meantime, check back for inane posts about the planting I'm doing on my balcony and the sure-to-be-genius DIY jewelry I'll be making.

Although first, I need to look up some new recipes for brussels sprouts ...

A Year Later

On March 25 of last year, I said goodbye to The Dude. We spent the day doing our favorite D.C. things -- sunrise at Iwo Jima, lunch at a food truck, and an afternoon trip to Starbucks, which was where we met. I remember that there were plenty of tears, but that I also felt somehow hopeful. This was not a relationship that was ending because someone cheated or someone stopped loving the other. I knew that we still loved each other and were just ending our relationship because circumstances forced us to. I thought that would somehow make the process easier.

Honestly, I felt like I was in such a good place in my life, with the confidence I had in myself, that I was sure I would be in a new relationship soon enough. But things haven't exactly worked out that way.

There have been other men. I've dated quite a bit. I've come to really enjoy the pure fun of a first date. I've been excited about several men. I've cautiously opened up to one or two. I've been hurt and disappointed by many of them, though especially the one who turned out to be married. And I've developed a surprising friendship with one.

But they aren't him. And I've come nowhere near finding that giddiness I had when I first met him, or the certainty that I would fall in love that I felt so early on with him. I think everyone who has truly been in a special kind of love can say that there is a different quality to it -- a purity or a calm or a peace that you feel.

Maybe the most telling aspect of this one-year mark is that I am still in love with him. I don't necessarily think that's holding me back or serving as any kind of roadblock -- I've put myself out there and I do know that things aren't going to work out with he and I -- but it does mean that I still miss him on most days. I certainly still compare every man I date to him. I don't have that self-propelling anger or blind rage that comes from a really bad breakup and helps us understand that we're better off now than we were then.

And I miss him especially today, when I can still picture that last hug and kiss on the forehead before he drove away, and cannot fathom that an entire year has passed. It's one thing to be fresh out of a relationship and have that fear that you'll never have that again with someone else. I guess it's a little scarier to still feel that way a year later.

Fashion Friday: Men's Edition - Size and Fit Do Matter (Of Your Shirt, That Is)

Hi guys -- For today's Fashion Friday, I asked a good friend of mine -- the always-dapper Emil Caillaux -- to write something for the gentlemen out there. You can follow Emil on Twitter and read some of his other writing on Thought Catalog. Read his stuff and tell him how fabulous he is ... after you read this. Enjoy!

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It should be clear to any of its residents that Washington, D.C. does not have seasons anymore. One day it’s cold, the other it rains, the next it’s summer. This presents a problem to those of us who have to go to work every day with something more presentable than sneakers and gym gear: what can you wear that is both presentable and makes you look good in the hot weather?

Let us be frank here: when applied correctly, layers can make you look good and fit during the winter months. The proper v-neck sweater helps streamline you, helping you cover un-tucked shirts and other unsightly weight increases (because damn it, you’re a man and you’re allowed to hibernate with a good glass of bourbon at home instead of going running in freezing cold winds, and damn it if those wings during the Super Bowl didn’t look good). The same can be said about a good jacket. Unfortunately, even the thinnest sweater is likely to make you sweat in humidity-laden Washington. This all puts your dress shirts in a prime viewing position.

Go through your shirt collection and put some on. If you really have not cared about where you get your shirts, then you might suffer from the general woes plaguing the average DC man: Parachutes (where your shirt ridiculously overflows after being tucked in and the sleeves are too long), Muffin Tops (where the shirt gives you a billowing waist despite being tucked in) and Shirt Dresses (where the shirt is just too long). During the winter, all these problems are easy to hide with a jacket, but none of these are acceptable if you want to go out during the summer, lest you take your usual winter jacket or sweater and want to burn up, Hot Pocket-style. The fact is that the size and fit of your shirt will determine how good you look in the warmer months.

Fitted shirts solve this problem. We can go into every detail about why fitted shirts are better (slimmer cuts and use of darts, for example) ad hominem ad nauseam, but the bottom line is that a fitted shirt will make you look better in every way possible and will help you stand out from the billowing masses.

“But don’t you have to be fitted for fitted shirts? And aren’t they expensive?” You can be fitted for shirts, but if you know you can, and can afford them, then you’ve never had a problem with flowing shirts. Yes, Charvet will charge you significantly for a bespoke shirt, but there are much more interesting (and local) alternatives for men in D.C. looking to stand out a bit.

Tired of the existing ill-fitting shirts that permeate the capital, Pranav Vora and Philip Soriano of Hugh & Crye started making and selling shirts with an onus on fit. Instead of having to deal with neck, shirt, and arm sizes, they offer nine sizes based on your body type, specifically designed to make you look both good and put-together. Simple and straight-forward – once you’ve figured out your size, all you have to do is stack up on their shirts. And trust me, stack up you will. Their offerings are versatile enough to be used for office gear as well as going out (all of their shirts have convertible cuffs, for example, so you can either wear them with cufflinks or traditional barrel style, depending on your style).

You can buy Hugh & Crye online and they can ship to your home, but if you have a chance (and want to save on shipping), stop by their Georgetown location on Wisconsin Ave. and O St. to pick up your purchases and talk to whoever’s there. Not only is it a good idea to actually see and try on the shirts themselves, but it’s a great opportunity to talk to the people responsible for the clothes you are going to wear. Plus, Pranav and Philip may consider themselves mere “shirtmakers” but they are at the forefront of redefining men’s style in D.C. and it’s always a good idea to hear them out. Simply put, if Washington Capitals players take advice and buy their shirts from these men, you are not above doing the same.

Alternatively, if you’ve just realized that you need to take all your shirts to Goodwill due to major parachuting, need to start from scratch, and don’t have enough cash to reinvent yourself in H&C, take a look at fitted 1MX shirts from Express (yes, that Express). These shirts can take a beating, fit nicely (make sure you pick the fitted cut, though the “muscle” fit is not bad either) and look great, and Express has two-for-one sales from time to time, so it’s easy to stock up on them. I usually keep an unopened white 1MX at the office for emergencies.

But what if you still want to wear a jacket? Perfectly valid, and thankfully, there are options. No, your North Face jacket is not one of those options, and, unless you regularly climb mountains in the Alps, should never be appropriate attire for the office or after-hour weekly activities. (Take note, Georgetown.) Cotton is an extremely breathable fabric, and cotton suit jackets and sportcoats will help you remain fresh throughout the summer. However, there is no point in buying fitted shirts if your jacket is three sizes too big. To avoid suffering from Potato Sack Syndrome, when you buy your jacket or suit, go one size less than what you usually go for. Make sure that it’s not too tight, just snug enough. You’re not supposed to waddle in your suit – you wear it, it does not wear you.

Looking good during the summer can be daunting for men. But it can be achieved successfully if you know what to get and where to get it. Moreover, it is an opportunity to reinvent and repackage who you are. It might cost a little bit at first, but consider it investing in yourself, and you’ll get your investment back in spades.

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Happy Friday!

I Feel Like A Changed Woman

Last week, I received a comment from a reader that basically said to just appreciate everything in the moment, even the tough times or feelings of disappointment, to get through them and live in the present. I've been thinking about that a lot since -- it's a very powerful way of thinking -- and really loving the effect it's had for me.

I'll be honest, last week wasn't the easiest week, and there were several disappointments. At the end of the day, I try to tell myself that the very best you can do each day is to just live for what you believe in and surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you, not the worst. Change is a vicious, evil mistress and I don't think any of us like it, especially when it feels like being plunged head first into icy water and needing those few minutes to catch your breath.

But it's a fact of life and it's always going to happen, so I've been trying to figure out how to handle it more gracefully and keep moving forward. For me, emotional by nature, that means working through the disappointments but maybe doing so more privately, definitely not tweeting about the things that bother me, and just overall trying to focus on the positive instead of the negative.

I like to think that the positive thinking has been responsible for how amazing the last couple days have been. Saturday night I went out with friends to celebrate my birthday. Men in tight jeans, cowboy boots and hats, shooting whiskey and two-stepping women around the dance floor? You all should know that is totally my scene. The night was perfect -- at the end of the night, my feet hurt from dancing, my throat hurt from singing too loud, and my face hurt from smiling.

Sunday I cancelled my big group brunch plans in favor of sleeping off the whiskey from the night before. I grabbed a late brunch with one of my best friends, then played out in the sun on the Southwest Waterfront. Came home and cooked myself a delicious dinner and felt strangely satisfied and grown-up, which was a huge improvement from feeling too old last week.

And today might somehow have been the best day yet. I went in to a quiet day in the office -- our contract is winding down as we run out of work -- and decided to play hooky for a few hours with a friend at the Lincoln Memorial. I think it had been a good ten years since I'd climbed those steps and gazed out on the Mall. The weather was gorgeous, my friend entertained me with stories, and I just felt like life slowed down to a happy, easy gait. After I went back to work for a few hours, I chatted with my very best friend and then got an offer on a new contract to start next week, before heading out for beers and grub with a friend. When I came home and picked up birthday packages that were waiting and found myself singing while I changed clothes ... I realized how happy I am right now.

So who knows. Maybe it's the weather, maybe it's the positive thinking, maybe it's just coming out the dark side of the tunnel finally ... but I feel like a new person, ready for the exciting part of change instead of that terrifying part. I'm actually somehow excited about turning a year older tomorrow.

Bring it -- I'm ready for it.

Fashion Friday: Spring Transition Tips

It's that time of year, thank you Punxsutawney Phil and your everlasting incompetence. Over the last couple of weeks, the birds have slowly started coming back to the area. I was thrilled to hear the annoying crow I will curse the whole of summer outside my window again last week. I was delighted by the appearance of daffodils in flowerbeds, along roadways and of course in grocery stores recently. All the signs are there. Spring is right around the corner, even giving us plenty of warm weather days sprinkled in these waning weeks of winter.

So, a few tips as you begin to transition your wardrobe for the change of season. For the love of all that is sacred, do not run out in a tube top and sandals the first time we hit 80 degrees. We're going to work up to that slowly.

1. Go through your closet: The best way to start a new season is by cleaning up and taking stock. Go through and get rid of all those winter pieces you didn't wear even once. (This will also make you feel less guilty when you're adding new spring and summer items to your closet, because you'll have room!) Shift your heavy winter items to the back of your closet and shelves and move the lighter items forward. Make note of what you have and what will work again this year, and also note staples you need to replace. Are your perfect white stretchy tees more dingy than perfect now? Throw those in with the donation pile and plan to replace them.

2. Check out the Spring trends and make a list: I don't tend to be heavily swayed by fashion trends. Instead, I usually look at what's coming -- you've surely seen plenty of neon, pastel and floral already -- and pick out a few of my favorite new trends that I'll try to incorporate. I get an idea of trend items I want to add to my wardrobe, as well as classic pieces I need to replace or update, and I make a mental shopping list. This is the easiest way for me to ensure that my closet will be filled with pieces I can actually wear, mix and match, rather than a hodgepodge of trendy pieces that I'll grow tired of in six weeks. And honestly, if there's something really trendy I want to try, I often pick one up at Forever21 or Old Navy, knowing I'm likely to only wear it a few times, anyway. It's somewhere to think about for a neon pink maxi dress, for example!

3. Focus on fabrics: One of the easiest ways to transition to a new season is to change the type of fabrics you are wearing. You can still wear long sleeves and pants for those chilly mornings and evenings, but instead of tweed, wool and corduroy, it's time for cottons and jerseys and lighter fabrics in general. (We'll work up to the linen and eyelet.) You don't need your wool scarf anymore, but a lightweight cotton scarf will serve you well in the mornings.

4. Think about prints: Just as with fabrics, your prints should also be changing. Instead of heavy plaids and argyles, it's time for more florals, stripes, and polka dots. Think about what a print symbolizes to you. If it makes you think of cozying up in front of a fire, it's time to move it to the back of the closet. If it makes you think of afternoon strolls in the sunshine or sipping cocktails along the water, it's time to put it into rotation.

5. Shoes, shoes, shoes: The same goes for shoes. It's really easy to create a transition look by slipping on a pair of peep-toes instead of your winter boots and show that you're ready to ease into warmer weather.

I know a lot of people have trouble figuring out what to wear when we're in-between seasons. To be honest, I'm sitting here giving you tips, but I have trouble sometimes too. Some mornings, I put something on and stand in the mirror, wondering whether it's really ok to wear this or that just yet.

So just start slow. Start replacing your wool coat with lightweight jackets and blazers as your outerwear, and loop bright, cotton scarves around your neck instead of heavy wool ones. You still want to layer, just using lighter layers. We'll get to summer and overexposed skin soon enough!

I have a feeling lots of you -- including me -- will be out shopping this weekend. Something about the warm weather we had this week just puts us in the mood, right? Try to at least take a look at your closet and take stock before you head out to the mall this weekend. You'll make better choices.

Happy Friday!

Murphy's Law

Yesterday I had a bit of a meltdown. A week from yesterday, I turn 33. Thirty-fucking-three. Yes, I have an extravagant three-part celebration planned. Yes, I have been thinking about my birthday outfits for weeks. Yes, I know I am fabulous and in the prime of my life and have all number of things going for me and most of the time I am really happy and content. But, shit, 33 seems old. And I spent a little too long yesterday thinking of all the things I don't have that I thought I would by 28, let alone 33.

For the record, it should be against the law to have pms, know that your contract gig is winding up and might dump you on the street soon, realize you've been single for almost exactly a year to the day, realize that year has flown by, AND turn 33, all in the same week. That's just cruel. And of course, it's not against the law. Rather, it's Murphy's Law, isn't it?

To add insult to injury, where the hell are these birthday cake Oreos hiding? Impossible to track down.

So I got a little depressed last night. Some tears might have been shed and a couple of angry texts might have been sent. But I have amazing friends and family. Some just commiserated, some promised engaging conversation over dinner and drinks tonight, some texted just to tell me I'm young and full of life, some promised my actual birthday will include prosecco on tap, and some vowed to scour the greater D.C. area in search of those damn Oreos. I even woke up to a text sharing the warm weather forecast for my birthday.

So, sure, maybe I'm a little sad about the things my life is missing. In fact, that's all I sat down to blog about now. But I realize that I have so many other things to be thankful for; that without all these people and experiences, my life really would be empty. So I'm determined to focus on the good.

And let me tell you -- 33 years gives you one hell of a shoe collection.

Fashion Friday: Your Coat's Detachable Belt

So this is something I have blogged about here for Fashion Friday before, but I've seen this problem out on the streets so much in the last two weeks that I figured it was worth another go-round.

The weather is a little confusing and transitional lately, I get that.  It's not quite winter, but not yet spring, either.  Most mornings, it's chilly enough that you might even need gloves and a scarf, but knowing that it will warm up later in the day, you don't necessarily want to drag along the wool coat.  (I still do, though, some mornings.)  At the same time, it's not quite warm enough for lighter-weight spring coats on most days.  So many of us are reverting back to our fall coats, which is perfectly fine.  

Except for this -- I've noticed we've got a bit of an epidemic on our hands.  Much like the sock-eating dryers we're all familiar with, closets in D.C. seem to have been having a fucking field day with every detachable belt on nearly every coat in this area.  I see women marching around all over the place with coats that should be belted, evidenced by sad, lonely, empty belt loops. And yet, they're not.  

This is not ok, people.  

Wearing the coat without the belt is akin to leaving the house only partially dressed.  It just looks sloppy!  Knock it off.

If you have a coat that is supposed to have a belt, which you no longer have, these are your options:

1.  Find some sort of belt replacement.  Unless you are sewing-machine inclined, this is probably a bad choice for you. 

2.  Remove the belt loops.  This isn't tough -- every woman should know how to use a seam ripper, and that's probably all you'll need.  You might need to make a few stitches to sew up any seams left slightly open after you take off the loop, but this is also easy.  I remove belt loops -- or ties on tie-back dresses -- all the time.  

3.  Donate that coat to Goodwill and get yourself a new coat.  If you're prone to losing the belt, consider using a few hidden stitches to tack it to the belt loops so you won't have this problem in the future.  

If, on the other hand, you know exactly where to find the belt for your coat and you're instead choosing to wear your coat belt-less, these are your options:

1.  Stop being a fucking moron and put the belt on the coat.

2.  Stop buying belted coats if you don't like wearing the belt. Buy a new coat instead.

Seriously, why would someone do this?  You just decide that you are so over the belt, and think it looks ok to remove it and wear the coat like that instead?  NO.  Sloppy!

There are many ways to wear your belted coat, if you want to experiment.  If you don't like the formal belting, you can tie the ends together behind your back.  Or you can knot the end of each side so that they will hang neatly at your side when wearing the coat unbuttoned.  If you're buttoning the coat, you really just need to tie it.  Anything else looks ... wait for it ... sloppy.  If this isn't your thing, why the hell did you buy a coat with a belt?  

On the brighter side, with the way the weather is trending, we should soon be in sundresses and sandals, with no need for coats! Next week ... Spring Transition Tips.

Happy Friday!